Headaches and heartpain.

Two days ago, I had a stab in my heart. Not that I would like to sound all dramatic but that was exactly how it felt like. Till now the feeling in my heart still remains and I wished that it never does happen to anybody else. It all first started out like this...

Our initial photographer was someone I thought could be trusted despite not having any mutual friends but we went ahead with the deposit because I simply believed that he would do good. Unfortunately, things took a turn sometime in mid 2017 where I started seeing bits of negativity posted about them. I did gave him the benefit of the doubt and later decided to hear his side of the story in which I thought okay, fine, let's give this guy a chance. But he later went silent on me and was uncontactable only to find out that he was doing his Umrah. Please note that I have no problems with people doing their pilgrimage but the least a company could do is to sent out a notice? Be it in a form of an out of office mail or just a quick shout out on their social media page so that we clients know that you're overseas. Oh wells. Long story cut short, he gave us his word that he'll return the deposit but it has been postponed thrice and I kindaaaaa give up or rather redha? I don't know man. It's like so sad to keep asking and half knowing that you're just gonna lose that sum that you've put in aka took you months to save up only to be placed in one that's irresponsible. :(

Secondly, venue of the wedding reception. I did a reccee mid last year at CDANS Home Team NS partly because it is walking distance from the house and thought the room was ideal for my reception of 300 - 350 guests (for a period of 6 hours seems okay). Only to find out 2 days ago that it was given to someone else because apparentlyyyyy my soft booking was not noted in their list of calendar. The person I liaised with, left the organization and totally didn't update his new team despite giving word to me that 1) should someone else be interested in the dates, I will be informed first. 2) booking and payment can only be done in January 2018. SO JUST IMAGINE HOW I FELT. Only god knows hahahahaha and I swear I wanted the ground to just swallow me up so that I could sleep in for as long as I want because I really didn't want to deal with such issues. Also to note that the new liaison officer simply ended the email conversation with a "sorry with the inconvenienced caused". Yupp, tell me about it...

Anyway, of course I had to go back to my second choice which is at Civil Service Club at Bukit Batok and I'm truly hoping for the best even though it isnt exactly what I had in mind either. But bleah beggars can't be choosers am I right?

If you thought my story ends there, you are wrong! :( I emailed The Villa at The Halia and their package for 1000 pax was super duper worth it! So worth it that I feel like crying at my office desk right now because I'm never letting go the fact that I could never do a combined wedding to save cost and get in the best wedding vendors, ever (in my eyes that is). Honestly, anything that were done by them are beautiful and would totally top all of my liking! Great location, fresh flowers used, clean environment, professionally written emails and the list could go on and nope, I'm not even biased right here. My only advise to any of you who are in a relationship or in the midst of planning of your own wedding, please get your in laws (or parents) to understand what saving means to you or just pray hard that they are on the same page to do a combined reception right from the start and it could ease the pain that I currently have hahahaha.

I guess it's truly true... What's meant to be, will be. And what's not... Will not.

Yikes it's 2018!

Mashallah this year is a whole brand new year for me to start "a new" and as much as I'm not keen on the whole new year resolution thingy, I hope it could at the very least help me reflect and bring me to become a better person. I've seen some improvement in myself but I feel like it is not enough. Though at the same time, I don't expect a miracle to happen aka for me to do a change 360 degrees out of a sudden too!

Completing my Zohor at work seems to be easier as I used one of the "spare room" which is basically an empty room which hosts our internal servers for our team vault and probably the Linus the mascot. + I could squeeze in that 5 mins right before lunch time ends. So, my next to tackle is to do Asar because to be honest, I can be quite free after 5pm+ but to actually go do my own stuff when everyone is back makes me feel abit uncomfy. My non-muslims colleagues have been really kind about it and makes me feel so thankful, everytime!

Another on my list (for now..), I hope to talk to my parents more often after I'm back from work but I'm usually annoyingly tired to talk much. I was told that once I get married and have kids, it's gonna be even more tiring. I don't know man... I'm praying hard to have an easy baby to handle in the future because omggg I don't know how else I could actually sleep in before 10pm (or maybe 11pm... Bleah) if the baby doesnt sleep? Okay, I am thinking a lil too much now.

Anyhoots, it's 10 months to the wedding in sha allah and I'm excited for everything except for moving out of my parents home and into Zaki's place. I guess every other lady would have the same feeling as I do but the fact that they have a chance of owning a place of their own, I'm envious. I can only pray........... That, I'll talk about it another time because for now, I'm just gonna enjoy the wedding prepration no matter how annoying my current photographer has been to us.

Toodles, till then! x